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what to do for a fatherless daughter…comments please!?

My god daughter has a “see ya here and there” type father. He comes and goes as he pleases and it affects my six year old god daughter immensely. Her mother also works a lot in order to provide for her, so i am one of her primary caregivers. I love having the opportunity and i try my best (through research and trial/error) to teach her and give her the best. I am a Psychology Major which I believe gives me a lot of insight into children and ways of thinking, but i also know there are somethings i can not give her that a good father would. I am very spontaneous and love to have fun yet I am also the one who punishes her when she is wrong (even if her mother is around). I try to give her a lot of love, affedction, trust, & knowledge. She spends 4 out of 7 nights a week with me and my life revolves around her. What can i do to make sure she is getting everything she needs? I come from a fatherless home (for the most part). I did have my stepdad in my life and he financially supported me my whole life and well as treated me like a daughter. But my god daughter has a father thats in and out of her life… a mother that works a lot and then theres me. Am i good enough to act as a parent to this child? She is very intelligent, fun and loving (im sure most kids are) but she has so many talents that i can see her becoming something great when shes older. I want her to succeed and not be brought down by actions her parents took. What can i do to make this happen?

Advice?

Input?

Comments?

 

Until next time,

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Jack Russell “Terrorist”….?

IMG_2646About a year ago i got a Jack Russell Terrier puppy from my boyfriend for Christmas. I was VERY nervous to train this pup! I have read numerous negative things on blogs sites, websites, wtc… She was the sweetest thing ever and still is! She was cage trained from day 1 and potty trained in about 2 months. By 7 months she no longer needed the cage and was able to stay home alone (cage free) while i was at work (8 hr periods). To this day i stil question if that is just her personality or her breed. There were many people who claimed they were crazy, wild, do not belong in a city environment, but my dog breaks the mold. She lives with me in a row home and walks daily but we do not have a backyard big enough for anything besides “potty”. She is calm, sweet and when she does get rough during play all i need to say is “do nice” and she is back to her normal relaxed self.

So this post is for all you people who speak negatively about Jack Russell’s ….they arent all wild, crazy, angry dogs!

Until next time,

date night….after 9 yrs

So first and foremost me and my significant other go on dates all the time. if thats what you want to call it. Most of the time i look at it as dinner….drinks…. or whatever you call it! Saturday night was date night for us. He got done work on time (by 8pm) and i was home ready and waiting…trying to look hot to grab his attention (lol).

Previously during that day i had spoken with an older co-worker who got into the topic of romance. He began to tell me how my generation is screwed, all romance is gone and people are only looking to hook up. As much as i wanted to fight with him, i stopped, shook my head and realized i agreed completely. There is no such thing as holding hands in public, kissing, taking long walks together, affection in public, etc… All these things are gone and chivilary is dead (for the most part).

That night as we waited for a table to open up, i explained this to my “date”. He fought back and said “i always open doors for you.” I kept quiet for a minute or two and said “No, you walk out first and push it open for me to grab it. Never once have you opened a car door for me.” This got me to thinking of my father. Although he wasnt the best father (who is?) he had a lot of beliefs about how women should be treated. He always believed in opening doors for me (car or a regular door), and he never let me walk on the side of the street where the cards were. Its little things like that i cherish. I explained all this to my “date” and then let it go because i was looking forward to a great night (without fighting).

Sure enough, he suprised me (and i DO NOT get suprised easily). He opened the car door as we walked to go home. (SHOCKER: because he also forgets everything after about 1 minute). It really made my night : ) I had to share this with you all. I know a lot of times i am very hard on him because he doesnt “measure” up to what i think i great man is. He is a great man and i thank God everyday for him.

Until next time,

Feb. 14th

Its unfortunate that todays society is all about “hooking up”, “getting the next best thing”, “shes hot/hes hot”. Like where did dating go? Where did getting to know someone go? I am so happy to say that today i am celebrating my 9 year anniversary with my love. We are both young and were only 14-16 y/o when we first started dating. Everyone said we wouldnt make it or thought it was wierd we were in a long term relationship at such a young age, but i couldnt be happier. I look forward to growing old and telling my children about our journey together. Its truely exciting to me to know that I was able to experience so much with one person. I hope for the future generations (and most importantly for my god daughter) young children can learn about romance and love again. I hope relationships arent just about sex and having a good time with the next one who comes along. Love is a fantastic thing to experience ❤

Until next time,

Good Mornings.

6:10AM Came very quickly this morning.  Everymorning same routine… today was no different. I woke up then went in to wake my god daughter up – sure enough the dog beat me to it and licked her face to wake her up. (She hates this aha) Anyway, she wakes up and is so excited “Tomorrow is the big day!” “Tonight we get to fill out Valentines day cards for school….and tomorrow is our romantic dinner date!” So of course me being happy shes happy I answer her statements then say lets go get dressed! She stops me and says wait a minute… “Give me a big hug and kiss” AHHH its times like this that melt my heart : )

The big day…. you know? Valentines Day

Since the big day is approaching I guess i should write a little something. Thursday – Valentines Day 2013.. Me & the Love of my Life will be together for 9 years!! AHHH! It still excites me like it was the first day. Unfortunatly, he is working that night until pretty late. Fortunatly, it gives me the night to have a “romantic date” with my little 6 year old! (Many times i refrence my god child as my little girl, godbaby, etc.. but remember she IS my god child). We have big plans… Speghtti, Garlic Bread, Ice Cream Sundaes, Candle Light, Music and more. Im so excited to suprise her. Ive made up fake menu’s and everything. I feel that children need to be suprised and shown its the little things that matter. I am a very big believer that dinner time is family time. As a child, I was aloud to eat in the living room, or heat up a stoffers, but with my god child and my future children i plan to change that. I want better for mine (even though i had a great mother). So now i am completely off topic (happens frequently) lol. Do you have any speical plans for yourself, your little guy or little girl??

Until Next Time,

Initial Thoughts!

Who am I? What a hard question to ask yourself. Its something that is not so easily answered. I am a young woman with goals (in a nut shell). I am a college graduate, a full-time working women and a god mother to a beautiful 6 year old girl. She was the reason for me creating this blog. I have questions… concerns and things id like to learn along the way. I co-parent with her mother, due to the fact that her father is out of the picture. Her mother works mostly nights, therefore i have the child 5 out of 7 days a week. She is my reason for living! My days consist of waking up, getting her & myself ready for school/work, sending her off then going to work, picking her up from school, dinners, homework, bed time stories, baths, etc…. To some it might sound a little crazy. “A God Mother having full responsibility of a child when the mother is able to do it?” Yes i get it! but for us it works. Unfortunatly the childs father is not in her life much. He shows up here and there… gets her hopes up, then disappears for months at a time. She is 6 and he has never shown her what a real man/father is. It breaks my heart for her, especially because i come from the same type of childhood. I think this makes it easier for us to relate. Looking back on my life (say 10 years ago) I never seen this to be my life. When i found out my best friend was preganant we were about 17. Seventeen!!! I had plans to go to my senior trip, graduate, attend college and a baby was not in the plan. When she told me i almost passed out, but when that baby was born i took full responsibility and looked after her as my own. I wouldnt have it anyother way! I hope this blog helps me relieve some stress that builds up, answers questions and ables me to relate to people who understand or are in the similar position.

Until next time,